Samoa - the greatest place on earth.



Its officially been one month since we moved here to NZ. And like a teenager whos head over heels with her first crush - I am giddy with delight about everything to do with living in Kiwi-land. (Sorry Samoa for being SO unfaithful with my affections, SO quick to love somewhere else...)

BUT! There are a few things about Samoa that I recollect wth great fondness. Stuff that i would definitely recommend to any potential new visitor planning a trip there.

Is it the golden beaches? Heck no! Never went to any. Not my thing. The tropical weather maybe? Get real! Hated it.The island wildlife? Are you nuts?! Cockroaches that fly into my hair...mosquitoes that drive me insane...dogs that are always thinking of new ways to attack me? Must be the rich and vibrant culture. The great blessing of fa'aSamoa. Ha. Will not even waste an exclamation mark on that ridiculous supposition.

Nope, the things about Samoa that Im ALMOST missing are:

1. Movies at Magik Cinema. Cheap, clean, and uptodate releases. And I even got hugs and hellos from the super nice ushers. ( Ex-students of mine...) HRH and I could have date night for twenty tala. Compare that with movies in NZ...HELLO it cost 89 dollars to take my kids to watch Despicable Me. And that was without popcorn. Yup, if youre going to Samoa, you defn need to check out the movie theater.

2. The bread from Siaosi's shop at Lotopa ( Mariyon Ent.) Hot, crusty, always perfect, always in huge demand. And only a couple of tala. NZ does not make good bread. I miss you breadshop!

3. Driving without thinking. I know i shouldnt but i could drive from A to B in Samoa and not even remember how i got there. Thats how well i knew the roads, every turn, every pothole, every unmarked lane. Now, I struggle to drive to the grocery store and I freak out at the sight of multi-lanes and unexpected roundabouts. Every 5 min drive requires intense concentration and massive deep breathing so i can force myself to 'stay calm Lani, stay calm...'

4. The video store. With all the pirated movies for rent. For only 5 tala. And at Video Plus at Lotopa, the lady was my super buddy and would hide my requested new releases so that i could rent them first. Now, i need a photo id to rent dvds from United Video and they only have ancient movies that we've already seen months ago. Since they do sily things like follow the copyright laws. Its just sooooo boring going to the video shop now!

5. I know i whined about it already, but i really do miss my chainlink fence with barbed wire and my killer dogs. And having a gun in the closet.

6. Drugs. Without prescription. Pharmacies at home are so accomodating and helpful. They dont think everyone's making P at home in their kitchen. They dont ask me for my ID and my address when i try to buy ColdnFlu meds. They dont give me the 3rd degree..."So what kind of blocked nose is it? HUH!? Speak up!" Ummm...a really bad one? "Well it says here in the computer that you bought coldnflu last week as well, whats that about huh?!" Ummm...i had a blocked nose last week too? "Well have you tried other remedies? Like what about sticking your head over a steaming hot bowl of water? Or shoving eucalyptus leaves up your nose?" No Im sorry I havent tried those...I JUST REALLY WANT SOME DRUGS DAMMNIT, GIVE ME THE DRUGS!

7. Stale tictacs. The tictacs in NZ are rockhard and so crunchy that they give me a sore jaw. And they're flinting pieces off my teeth. The ones in Samoa are all humidified ( or something)from the humidity so they're soft. And eating 6 packs of them doesnt hurt.

So there you have it. If youre planning a trip to Samoa, i highly recommend that you - go to the movies, eat bread from Siaosi's shop, rent a car and drive a lot, enjoy the safe surroundings, do prescription drugs WITHOUT a prescription, rent movies from Video Plus that havent even made it to the Hollywood screen yet and eat profuse amounts of tic tacs.

My Samoa - the Pearl of the Pacific!